Narratives of the Mental Monsters
I am not good enough
I am not worthy or don’t deserve
They have an issue with me
I don’t belong
They don’t like me
This won’t end
This might end and I’m scared
I am alone
No one understands
I’ll be a burden
I’m tired
I won’t get better
I can’t talk to anyone
I am weak
Why did I do this
Why am I like this
I’m done
They think I am a drama queen or attention seeker
no one cares about me
It’s my life so it’s my problem
they will judge me
It’s not that bad
it’ll be better tomorrow if I just keep things as they are
therapy isn’t for me
drugs aren’t for me
food isn’t for me
sleep isn’t for me
friends aren’t for me
family isn’t for me
this pain is just normal
being depressed is normal
being anxious to extreme is normal
I heard that (insert name) has mental health problems, but they have it easy
My life is good I shouldn’t feel this way
I’m sick of this and sick of me
All these feelings can be addressed and shouldn’t be felt for the long term. We all have self doubt and we all have down days. If they persist, that is not healthy and you deserve to have attention from someone that can help support you. I understand. These feeling hurt and can be heavy to carry all the time. Do not let them sit with you.
Facebook groups are sometimes a good place to start. Strangers on the internet; no judgement and often have words of wisdom.
Online therapy/ in person - a slightly bigger step and one that can be scary to do. Therapy doesn’t have to cost the earth, yes it is an investment, but a therapy session might be the best money you ever spent on yourself.
text a friend, and meet up. I promise you’ll feel better having seen someone in person.
Be vulnerable to open up; the most exposed you’ll ever be; yet the reward could be amazing. I have been honest online for quite sometime and actually, i’ve found it only positive and helped me feel better. It’s initially terrifying and yes, some people may judge was you say, but those people are probably not even humans you really care about or have a connection with anyway. So who cares?!?!
as always, thanks for reading …